Category: stories


Grad School

Studying Math

Not what I'm applying for, but you get the idea...

So I’m applying for PhD programs, because I love school. A large percentage of my friends headed back to school this fall, resulting in more than a little jealousy, which is how I knew it was time to get over my hang ups an start applying.

I’ve conquered my first hurdle  — The GRE.

Now I’m faced with the annoyingly tedious, almost overwhelmingly so, task of completing the applications for the schools I would like to attend. Which isn’t as bad as 1am makes it feel.

So I’m researching the programs, finding out the due dates, emailing God and everybody — basically spending the best Wednesday night ever. Though the search through J.C. Hutchins‘ archive to remember how I’d discovered one of the schools on my list was fun.

Hurdle 2 should be mostly dominated before the end of the week. Which will begin Hurdle 3 — the waiting.

I’m not currently emotionally prepared to contemplate the final hurdles. But I will keep posting here, because why wouldn’t I?

Rooted

I don’t know why I keep doing this to myself. I continually knock on a door knowing the lack of response will only chip another piece off my heart. Yet, despite the pain, I find myself on this doorstep once more.

The wisteria is a nice touch, screening my small concrete square. He must have paid quite a bit to get full-grown wisteria in the brief interlude I didn’t stand here. I do appreciate that my desperation, or stupidity, or stubbornness, or insanity, or whatever ties me to this small spot is no longer on display for all who pass by.

I tried to leave forever once. Walk clean away without looking back on the square of suffering that has defined my life for the last slice of forever. The thought of not having the pain of chipping bits of my heart off was almost as terrifying as the idea of having to learn to live with the constant pain of a piecemeal heart.

My feet paused in fear and my head turned – I looked back and lost all resolve to keep my feet from walking their familiar path back to this square.

So now I find myself back in my small square of self-imposed servitude to a love that will never reciprocate. Because the pain that has become a part of my essence and existence comforts me. Trying to find a new place and way of life would damage my heart more than fully accepting the reality I have chosen. I have put my roots down here and leaving would be more painful than the constant chipping.

The only comfort I would wish is a location with less rain; it could be quite pleasant to stand here in the sun. But the raindrops that cover the ground most afternoons are particularly refreshing, and the animals that scurry around are almost endearing. I would rather like to be inside with him and not out here slicing my heart to oblivion, but I know this square marks the boundaries of our interaction. As long as I can stay in my tranquil square, my self-scarred heart can endure anything.

The Weight of Light

Vlad hesitated; his hand hovering mid-air, an inch before Ameel’s face. The solitary tear silently sliding from the corner of her sea-grey eye contained her heart and his fears. A crystalline distillation of their brief relationship poised at the edge of an eternal moment.

Closing the distance would define their connection.

Withdrawing would erase all they had.

His breath slowed as he watched the tear shimmer down her cheek. Vlad felt Ameel’s pull on him and wondered what affect their attraction would have. A vague hope of their connection drawing them into a closer orbit echoed on the edge of his heart. The shout of fear their gravity would resonate and throw them apart crashed through his head.

Ameel perched on the edge of her seat, statuesque. Her stillness, a marked counterpoint to the cacophony of Vlad’s head, betrayed nothing.

In perfect silence and grace, the immense light droplet slid from Ameel’s chin.

I can’t remember how I came across Jennifer Hudock’s work online, but I’m glad I did.

Her stories are interesting to read with intriguing character development. She has podcasted Goblin Market which you can listen to free on her website. But it’s her newest project that has me really excited for her work.

She has started self-publishing a collection of her short stories, Dark Journeys, in ereader formats. Each story in the collection is released individually, with previews on her website. So you can check it out and pick the story up at Amazon.com or Smashwords.com. And the best part of the deal is that most of the stories are only 99 cents with none of them being more than $2.

Jennifer Hudock is taking online writing and publishing into her own hands and in new directions. She’s made the cover art and excerpt available so that people like me can blog about it and share the fantastic. And so I am covering it here; I love watching what new ideas she and her fiance/fellow podcaster/author, James Melzer.

So here is the newest story in the collection, and it’s actually a 2-for-1 deal. If you like Jennifer Hudock’s work, you should let her know!

I know it’s stupid, but I wish I had a backpack full of brains instead of a week’s supply of granola and dried fruit. Unfortunately when you’re packing for a big hike, the last thing you really worry about is how you’re going to fend off the walking dead. I’m more or less convinced that a backpack full of brains would be a good distraction, allowing me to climb down from this tree while they were feasting and run away.

So far, the tree has been a pretty safe haven. The dead aren’t smart enough to climb trees; they’re clumsy. These last two hours though, their focus seems to have gotten sharper, and I know it’s because I’m the only meal within a ten mile radius. And that is where the brains would come in handy. I’d only need to throw one or two of them and then watch them all stumble after it like broken dogs fighting over a bone.

Instead of brains though, I have granola bars and banana chips and enough water to choke a horse in the desert. I don’t even have a gun, and even if I did, I wouldn’t know the first thing about how to use it. I’m just a girl, and before you say, “Well I guess that was your first mistake,” I’ll have you know that I survived the first attack. I swung my way through a wave of hungry, dead campers while my boyfriend Keith was overwhelmed and torn limb from limb like a Thanksgiving turkey at a homeless shelter.

The last thing I heard him say was, “Run, Laura! Run!” That second “run” was wet, and it gurgled in his throat like hair in a clogged drain.
I didn’t ask questions. With a heavy branch in my hand, I picked up my feet and booked outta there Olympic-gold-medal-track-runner-style.

Keith’s garbled screams echoed off the canyons, and I ran until I couldn’t hear them anymore. By the time I stopped to catch my breath and shed a couple of tears, I was lost.

When we were attacked, we had already hiked about two days from the state park parking lot. Silly me left Keith in charge of both the compass and the GPS, which meant I was more or less screwed, and I wasn’t going back for either one. I didn’t even realize just how badly I was screwed until I circled back around the same rock formation the fifth time, stifling my own screams of frustration.

That was then I saw them. There were five of them staggering toward me in dusty clothes, their gore-crusted mouths gaping, innards strewn like gutted trout. Three of them were pretty badly decomposed from the smell of them, and the other two looked more like recent victims. Possibly even victims of the rotting corpses leading the way.

For a second I was scared that Keith was right behind them, but so far there’s been no sign of him.

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